Emma Garcia, Online Editor

A few months ago, I went and saw Mockingjay and Natalia and I each got a large soda. Now this was not just a large soda. This was a LARGE soda that was bigger than my face. I got it because it was refillable and we would be there for a while. I regretted this because that thing was heavy.

While carrying this huge soda, and leaning a little to the side because of the weight, I wondered why America was so fat even though we had to carry these huge sodas around. It seemed a little counter intuitive.

It wasn’t until I got back to my seat that I realized the reason the weight of the soda doesn’t matter: cupholders.

If someone had to carry around a soda like the one I had and lift it all the way up to their mouths to drink they would do one of two things:

  1. Burn off at least some of the calories and sugars they were getting from the soda by having to, should I say, exercise to get the soda to their mouth.
  1. They would get a smaller soda and would end up getting last calories.

Either way it works.

But cupholders ruin this. With cupholders, especially with the soda being as tall as it was, you don’t have to pick up the soda. This gets rid of the “exercising” thing.

I think this discovery has opened my mind to the ways movie theaters make you fatter when you don’t realize it (other than the obvious, you’re sitting on your ass for two hours instead of at the gym ways). Such as, the deals that let you get a large popcorn, which can feed a family in a third world country for as long as the butter holds out, along with your large soda. Or, even better, the ones that let you get a medium of each for a deal.

That medium deal makes you think that you’re healthy, or at least healthier. You didn’t get a large, after all. Nevermind that the medium could still feed a family in a third world country or that you’re still going to have to leave the movie halfway through for a bathroom break because the soda is bigger than a child’s face, you chose the medium and that makes you healthy.

Curse you movie theaters and your delicious popcorn and manipulative ways, curse you.